Posts Tagged ‘Babyface’

OK, this just can’t be happening. Does Mo’Kelly have this right? First, Eddie Murphy seduces Mel B., promises a child and marriage; then kicks her to the curb while starting up a romance with Tracey Edmonds. A minor detail, but neither Edmonds nor Murphy’s ink was dry on their respective divorces.

Oops.

Prior to then, it was widely accepted that Murphy and Kenny “Babyface” Edmonds were very good friends.

Uh…we can assume it’s now widely accepted that they’re not anymore.

Moving right along…

Murphy’s divorce centered around his many “dalliances” (allegedly) and Edmonds divorce was in connection with her affair with entertainment lawyer Londell McMillan (ahem…allegedly).

Yeah, and Barry Bonds “allegedly” used steroids.

Continuing to move right along…

Mel B. announced she was pregnant with Murphy’s child, while Murphy simultaneously acted like a petulant child, announcing his engagement to Tracey Edmonds after only ten months of semi-creeping/adultery. Mel B. announced her paternity lawsuit…and oh yeah, remembered to inform us she was already married to some random dude dating back to when the child named in the paternity suit was a zygote. Mel B. then parlays her systemically dysfunctional life into a gig on Dancing with the Stars.

Did Mo’Kelly forget any major details?

Scrolling down the page to somewhat recent history; Eddie and Tracey steal away to Bora Bora to “symbolically” exchange vows, something akin to Brandy Norwood’s “spiritual union.” The ceremony in Bora Bora was tantamount to exchanging friendship bracelets in the 3^rd grade. Neither mean a damn thing and rarely last past the end of the week.

Wait, that’s not true. Friendship bracelets at least cost a hell of a lot less than that sham in Bora Bora.

It seems that not only was the “symbolic union” worth a pile of crap in the U.S., Edmonds and Murphy didn’t even make it through the “honeymoon stage” without breaking up, with guests alleging that Murphy was verbally abusive during the reception and in the days afterwards.

How giddy is Mel B. right about now? Uh…VERY?!

Damnit! Mo’Kelly said he HAD to go to their “wedding!” Mo’Kelly predicted a “Hot Ghetto Mess” and that’s EXACTLY what’s happened.

Mo’Kelly’s Preview of Eddie and Tracey’s Wedding

Supposedly Johnny Gill was the best man in Bora Bora.

Yeah right. He was the flower girl.

(Isn’t she just adorable?)

Mo’Kelly doesn’t care if Johnny was standing on the stage in a suit, shoulder-to-shoulder with the groomsmen. He was the flower girl, don’t get it twisted. You can glue chicken feathers on that chinchilla all day long. It won’t EVER earn a spot in my 2-piece and biscuit meal. And you can pin twelve boutonnières on Johnny Gill and they still don’t change a thing.

It is what it is…

Johnny Gill was the flower girl…period. You can’t put one over on Mo’Kelly.

If we can agree that the whole “spiritual union” ceremony was a sham, logic dictates that all of its participants were perpetrating a lie in some form or fashion.

Ergo, Johnny Gill was the flower girl…period. Rose petals, knee highs and pink petticoats.

Flower girl. It is what it is.

The real question is; who is the sympathetic figure here? Tracey Edmonds? Hardly. Divorce from Babyface finalized in June, 2007 and announced engagement to Murphy July, 2007. Yes, ONE whole month later. And yes, Edmonds revealed to the media she started dating Murphy in December of 2006.

Sympathetic figure? Not a chance in the world.

Proof

And as for Eddie…

Well, who DIDN’T know he would self-destruct, honestly? He reportedly told Mel B. he would marry her after a month of dating her, which seems to be consistent with how quickly he “bed and wed” Tracey Edmonds. Notice the pattern.

Proof

Mo’Kelly’s just mad he didn’t get to see this joke of a couple firsthand. We all knew this marriage was destined to crash a
nd burn. When you jump off a building with a parachute of bricks, there’s only one result to be had. But none of us really predicted that the “marriage” would never technically take place at all. Nobody could foresee that the “relationship” would go down in a fiery blaze after only two weeks of a “Brandy Norwood spiritual union.” It’s funny as hell no doubt, but Mo’Kelly didn’t see this one coming.

See, if they stopped telling that damn lie that Johnny Gill was the best man they probably could’ve lasted three weeks. God don’t like ugly.

Johnny Gill was the flower girl. Eddie knows it, Tracey knows it and damnit Arsenio does too.

Rose petals, knee highs and pink petticoats.

RELATED: An Open Letter to Johnny Gill and Those Like Him

OK, this just can’t be happening. Does Mo’Kelly have this right? First, Eddie Murphy seduces Mel B., promises a child and marriage; then kicks her to the curb while starting up a romance with Tracey Edmonds. A minor detail, but neither Edmonds nor Murphy’s ink was dry on their respective divorces.

Oops.

Prior to then, it was widely accepted that Murphy and Kenny “Babyface” Edmonds were very good friends.

Uh…we can assume it’s now widely accepted that they’re not anymore.

Moving right along…

Murphy’s divorce centered around his many “dalliances” (allegedly) and Edmonds divorce was in connection with her affair with entertainment lawyer Londell McMillan (ahem…allegedly).

Yeah, and Barry Bonds “allegedly” used steroids.

Continuing to move right along…

Mel B. announced she was pregnant with Murphy’s child, while Murphy simultaneously acted like a petulant child, announcing his engagement to Tracey Edmonds after only ten months of semi-creeping/adultery. Mel B. announced her paternity lawsuit…and oh yeah, remembered to inform us she was already married to some random dude dating back to when the child named in the paternity suit was a zygote. Mel B. then parlays her systemically dysfunctional life into a gig on Dancing with the Stars.

Did Mo’Kelly forget any major details?

Scrolling down the page to somewhat recent history; Eddie and Tracey steal away to Bora Bora to “symbolically” exchange vows, something akin to Brandy Norwood’s “spiritual union.” The ceremony in Bora Bora was tantamount to exchanging friendship bracelets in the 3^rd grade. Neither mean a damn thing and rarely last past the end of the week.

Wait, that’s not true. Friendship bracelets at least cost a hell of a lot less than that sham in Bora Bora.

It seems that not only was the “symbolic union” worth a pile of crap in the U.S., Edmonds and Murphy didn’t even make it through the “honeymoon stage” without breaking up, with guests alleging that Murphy was verbally abusive during the reception and in the days afterwards.

How giddy is Mel B. right about now? Uh…VERY?!

Damnit! Mo’Kelly said he HAD to go to their “wedding!” Mo’Kelly predicted a “Hot Ghetto Mess” and that’s EXACTLY what’s happened.

Mo’Kelly’s Preview of Eddie and Tracey’s Wedding

Supposedly Johnny Gill was the best man in Bora Bora.

Yeah right. He was the flower girl.

(Isn’t she just adorable?)

Mo’Kelly doesn’t care if Johnny was standing on the stage in a suit, shoulder-to-shoulder with the groomsmen. He was the flower girl, don’t get it twisted. You can glue chicken feathers on that chinchilla all day long. It won’t EVER earn a spot in my 2-piece and biscuit meal. And you can pin twelve boutonnières on Johnny Gill and they still don’t change a thing.

It is what it is…

Johnny Gill was the flower girl…period. You can’t put one over on Mo’Kelly.

If we can agree that the whole “spiritual union” ceremony was a sham, logic dictates that all of its participants were perpetrating a lie in some form or fashion.

Ergo, Johnny Gill was the flower girl…period. Rose petals, knee highs and pink petticoats.

Flower girl. It is what it is.

The real question is; who is the sympathetic figure here? Tracey Edmonds? Hardly. Divorce from Babyface finalized in June, 2007 and announced engagement to Murphy July, 2007. Yes, ONE whole month later. And yes, Edmonds revealed to the media she started dating Murphy in December of 2006.

Sympathetic figure? Not a chance in the world.

Proof

And as for Eddie…

Well, who DIDN’T know he would self-destruct, honestly? He reportedly told Mel B. he would marry her after a month of dating her, which seems to be consistent with how quickly he “bed and wed” Tracey Edmonds. Notice the pattern.

Proof

Mo’Kelly’s just mad he didn’t get to see this joke of a couple firsthand. We all knew this marriage was destined to crash and
burn. When you jump off a building with a parachute of bricks, there’s only one result to be had. But none of us really predicted that the “marriage” would never technically take place at all. Nobody could foresee that the “relationship” would go down in a fiery blaze after only two weeks of a “Brandy Norwood spiritual union.” It’s funny as hell no doubt, but Mo’Kelly didn’t see this one coming.

See, if they stopped telling that damn lie that Johnny Gill was the best man they probably could’ve lasted three weeks. God don’t like ugly.

Johnny Gill was the flower girl. Eddie knows it, Tracey knows it and damnit Arsenio does too.

Rose petals, knee highs and pink petticoats.

RELATED: An Open Letter to Johnny Gill and Those Like Him